Got one today that was great -- customer purchased 3 weeks ago, claimed he really enjoyed it for the first two weeks but has since gotten busy, can't play as much. He would like to go back to Free version.
I gave him a refund. Haha!
Rabid Rabbit currently studies the merchant ship docked with his own. A rather big Space Truck with interesting cargo modifications. Behind him the political officer of said ship yammers on in a vague attempt to screw with him.
"... thus, the value of this information has decreased in worth. My employer is willing to pay half the agreed upon fee, up front, as a measure of good faith, even before verifying the contents of the package."
Though Rabid wasn't looking, he could feel the slimy smile of the political officer.
Rabid turns a little to glance at the man. Typical blond syndic looks, polite blasê expression, warm friendly disposition. Truly here was a credit to the 'velvet glove' approach.
As the man finishes, Rabid settles on the chair across the conference table. With no real preamble he props the chainsaw on the table and begins checking it over.
"So, Mr. Hamilton. To summarize. Your employer contracted us for the agreed price of $57 thousand credits, around 54 weeks ago, to deliver this particular package to a rather big ship around here." Rabid gestures with a thumb out the viewing port. "Now, though we're still within the delivery date, he wants to pay me half."
"Oh no sir. My employer does not want to pay you half, that would be barbarous. He's a man of impeccable honor! He is, though, unable to pay the full amount because of circumstances beyond his control, thus the offer to pay before even opening the package, if at a reduced amount."
Rabid mmms at the earnest bullshitting man.
"Since I dragged myself across the quadrant to deliver in good faith, the package will be what your employer asked for. You know that, I know that. But, sadly, I guess I won't be able to make this delivery as I never found your employers ship."
The Political Officer blinks, "I'm not sure I follow."
"I'm saying, regrettably, I will have to admit failure of my mission. I never found the ship carrying the person to whom I was supposed to deliver the package. I'll have to take a $57k hit plus expenses, quite considerable." Rabid sighs, "Alas I failed. Such is ... what is that expression .. shanum law? I can't quite pronounce it right."
The political officer smiles, "Quite a jest. The ship is right outside and I'm sitting right here."
Rabid tilts his head, "I'm sorry, but what are you talking about? All I saw out the port was one of my own ships. One I am going to auction off."
The man's smile freezes, "You can't be serious."
"I'm quite serious, and you as a member of my crew should know me better by now."
"A member of your crew!?" the Political Officer stands.
"Well, yes? I mean, after all I never found any ship out here, that meant you must have traveled with me willingly.." Rabid's voice lowered, "As I tend to be rather peckish with stowaways. You're either my Political Officer, who has been working for me at a 'reduced price', or you're a stowaway."
A bright detonation shreds some of the Space Truck's hull from the inside. The Political Officer rivet's his eyes on the view port as the hole vents atmosphere. Through the hole two figures in bright green Javat are sucked outwards before becoming ballooning smears of decompressed meat. His employer's ship is suffering from a bad case of being boarded!
Rabid languidly gets to his feet. His hand rests easily on the chainsaw. "Make your choice Mr. Hamilton. The voices in my head are telling me I should not be missing so much fun. I'm rather inclined to agree with them."
Rabid
.
