I quit! I can't do it!

[cerseisadvocate]

What I wanted to say is that you can want to play with permadeath (as playing without is a different feeling) and still be frustrated (up to the edge of quitting) by not finding a way to master the game as far that you do not feel compleetly helpless.

Though custom difficulty might still be a solution.
@op if you like to play with permadeath but the game is too hard you might use the custom difficulty to appply some buffs to the player.

[fallen]

Def suggest Custom Difficulty.

[wali]

I may be a little late with chiming in - but in case you ever check back, meatabstract :

It's definitely, absolutely possible to succeed in crew combat without using your Captain. In my opinion, the trick is resiliency. Usually, I wouldn't post a "this is how you do it", and more or less tell you how to play.. but since you seem pretty disappointed with a game you otherwise enjoyed a great deal, why don't you try this..

Fill positions 1 and 2 with Bodyguard/Swordsman officers. These guys come online very early on, as Sharp Counter + Balanced Blade have a lvl.1 Swordsmanship requirement, and so you can proceed straight to Bodyguard 5 for Honor Guard.
Eventually, they will be able to switch positions at will, thanks to Slashing Retreat / Devastating Charge. So you can apply Honor Guard to whoever is taking a beating or needs debuffs removed.
Strength of Steel is a pretty potent healing factor, and minimizes the risk of follow-up debuffs.

Especially as an Explorer Captain, Positions 3 and 4 could be Xeno Hunter / Exo Scout officers.
You can use Aggressive Advance from position 4, and just have the two switch position each time you need it.
Between Steady Mobility and Honor Guard from your front-line, these guys are surprisingly tough to take down. Add Unfailing Stand when required, as another defensive layer.
At the same time, they are very capable of taking out snipers (first or second turn) and cracking Xeno.

I'm sure there are a host of other approaches, which are just as viable. But this one allows you to minimize risks (and frustration), and hopefully you can enjoy the game again.
If you wanted to, you could even still bring your Captain along as an Explorer / Exo Scout / Xeno Hunter. It's valid, but absolutely not required if your idea was to use the talents in a non-combat capacity.

Best of luck, and I hope you're going to stick around. There are so many ideas flying around here, it's pretty amazing.