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Post by slayernz on Oct 21, 2013 1:51:54 GMT -5
boeu, err ... did YOU consume the port and valium ... or was that what the psychologist took before diagnosing you?
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Post by boeu on Oct 21, 2013 3:17:52 GMT -5
boeu, err ... did YOU consume the port and valium ... or was that what the psychologist took before diagnosing you? Lol wat I consumed before local copper took me in. They asked if I wanted to stay for the week to sort it out but my reply was "I have another 2ltr of port in my bag and I want to go drink that" so they said take these meds for the rest of your life. Lol
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Post by boeu on Oct 21, 2013 3:27:26 GMT -5
And yes there is more to it but not for the net
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Post by Deleted on Oct 21, 2013 9:17:16 GMT -5
Anyone else have PTSD?
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Post by captain nemo on Oct 23, 2013 14:49:23 GMT -5
I have stress related depression and a lot of days are battles just to get thought the day. That's why you don't see me on here for long periods of time. But this is a great place to hang out at. I agree that the people here are first rate too, meaning friendly & very nice. Wishing everyone the best with there problems
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Post by HateSolstice on Oct 24, 2013 1:21:09 GMT -5
I apologize for the lack of updates/continuation of my story. I have been trying to keep busy the last couple days so I don't continue my downward spiral.
For example, today went with the wife and bought her an early anniversary gift: one of those Keurig coffee makers. I was really skeptical of the thing at first, because we have a $10 Mr. Coffee that brews just as well. BUT, apparently this thing also has little cups of ciders, hot chocolate, a bazillion other coffee flavors and roast types. In other words, I didn't know a damn thing about it but she's super excited about it, so I will assume that I did pretty good.
Anyway, I will write more depressing stuff later. You know, when I'm feeling more down or whatever. Today was a good day, and it was the first time in a long time that I didn't feel completely invalid as a person.
...Maybe writing this stuff has actually been helping. Or maybe it's just pure coincidence. Either way, I am just going to accept it as it is.
EDIT: Oh, and the Keurig also does teas. I forgot about that. The downside, though, is that the brewer only has one heat setting, so can't set it to the proper heat ranges for different tea types. Not sure if anyone here is a tea drinker, but a friend of mine from work is a big-time aficionado and educated me about "proper" tea steeping methods. Black teas should be brewed at different temperature than green teas, and don't forget white teas and everything in between. Certain teas can be steeped multiple times before being used up, where as others are one and done.
Sorry, I find stuff like that fascinating. Science just kicks ass, regardless of what it is.
Wow, what a long ass edit. >_>
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Jamozk Ekhiss
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Post by Jamozk Ekhiss on Oct 24, 2013 10:10:09 GMT -5
Another interesting (or not, if it doesn't interest you) thing about tea is that you don't actually need to boil the water if you use a teabag - that's just what people were told (in the UK, this is) during World War II so any contaminants in the water would be killed off.
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Post by Alex Fury on Oct 24, 2013 10:21:32 GMT -5
HateSolstice - Hey brother, can always vent. It's something we need to stay sane in this insane world. I'm there with you on a few things. Personally I'm not a fan of 'modern medicine' as (in my opinion) they don't know their rear from their elbow on the whole. They rarely cure, because they don't know how, and it's not in their best interests. Psychological ones especially. This inane belief that 'we're all the same, so everything should work the same' is more destructive than useful. And then the mis-labeling of things just to 'find a reason' and make more money off of it. Example: I (supposedly) have ADHD. My dad is adamant about it. Save the last two times I went in, I was told if I have it, it's minimal or some such nonsense. What it boils down to, is I don't really learn/work quite the same as the supposed 'average' person. It's practically considered a disease, which is pure idiocy in and of itself. Then take that there's some 50+ symptoms of it and you 'have' ADD/ADHD if you have any 15 or so of those. NO DISEASE has that. My neurons fire in patterns that are a bit different than others, and so I act and do things a bit differently from others. I've been told I have mild manic-depressive disorder and that it was misdiagnosed. It's been suggested I have mild Asberger's too. No two docs have agreed on what I 'have' and the level of whatever it is/they are. Overall look at how there's so many drugs to do the same thing. How most of the 'helpful' stuff does more damage to you than it helps you. The way you take 6 people and give them the same drug and it works differently on all 6 of them. I like science too, always was good at it. But modern medicine may as well be called modern witch doctors most of the time. Add in the phenomenal costs they have for medical school, the phenomenal costs to 'get better', the idiocy of insurance (dont get me started on osama-.. err obamacare) and everything else, makes the whole thing just a bad joke to me. I'm likely dealing with a bit of depression these days. In fact I'm fairly sure of it. I have (mild?) ADHD, mild insomnia, and I'm a night-owl by nature. I'm lucky to have my mind shut off by 2am. Only earlier is if I'm just truly wiped. And I work in a 9-5 world. Ouch. Add in that due to these 'conditions', mixed with nearly 'helicopter' type doting parents who made sure I couldn't 'fail', meant that I didn't learn about how to deal with the real world until college and post-college practically. Trust me, I could go on and on and on. Best thing I can suggest for you man, is this: Find two things. 1 productive, 1 fun, that you can focus on. The 'fun' for distraction and sanity. Something to make you feel good. It may be lasting, it may be fleeting, but we all need that. Music, dance, gaming, exercise, what have you. The productive, can even be a hobby, something at work, some kind of learning or self-betterment. With luck it will be something you can at least somewhat enjoy, but if not, that's why you have something else to keep you sane while doing it. Talk things out too. Whether it be verbal diarrhea here to just get the negative out, or actual discussion. Sometimes (often?) it is actually more helpful to talk to strangers about it, as they know less of your history and potentially be less judgemental, as they don't know your environment and background.
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Post by HateSolstice on Oct 24, 2013 11:35:41 GMT -5
Alex Fury - I definitely get what you're saying. Maybe part of it is that I don't know any of you personally. At the same time, this is most definitely a tight-knit community. I really like it here, and regret for having been away for so long. I have mixed feelings about modern medicine myself. I know there doctors and professionals out there that really do care and try their best. I have a really good family/general practice doctor, and she has been really concerned about my depression. My psychiatrist actually started seeing due to court orders for our custody battle to get our daughter home. That is a whole other mess of a story for another time. Anyway, I have only seen my psychiatrist twice so far. He seems pretty smart and like a decent guy, and also seems to actually want to help. He even told me that no amount of drugs is going to truly help until we can fix the source: get our daughter home. To me, it makes total sense, because this all flared up shortly after this nightmare started. So he hasn't been trying "fix" me with tons of medications I don't need though he did give me Xanax to try and help shut my brain off at night. So far, I haven't any difference. My mind still races, thinking random things not just doting on depressive crap. Then we have a counselor that I really like. He does couples counseling and addiction, and he's a real good guy to talk to. Just get to see him as often as I would like. It's kinda funny because really into riding Harleys, but is also a big animal lover. With all that said, I get very skeptical of stuf like flu vaccines. I just don't believe they do a damn bit of good at all. Go figure.
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Jamozk Ekhiss
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Post by Jamozk Ekhiss on Oct 24, 2013 11:37:19 GMT -5
Agree with you there on the misdiagnosis thing - I'm pretty sure I'm not autistic, but everyone says I display a lot of the traits (I love numbers, can memorise things very easily (pi, the periodic table - that sort of thing), and can't really talk to people unless it's on the internet). It's all too easy for psychologists and doctors to label people with something that isn't true just because they display a few signs of it. The medicine part, I agree with you in terms of doctors trying to cure apparent mental issues with drugs, as that can cause even worse problems, and doesn't really work anyway. Other stuff, like vaccines, I'm fine with, as I've studied them and know how they work - I generally only accept things if I can see how and why they work.
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Post by Alex Fury on Oct 24, 2013 12:12:25 GMT -5
HateSolstice and Jamozk Ekhiss - Yes, I was somewhat overblowing that 'all docs are out for money' or such. There are many who care, though it's also the overall system as opposed to simply the people that we deal with (doctors, nurses, etc). Vaccines I have no problem with, though I am not one of the germophobic types. I don't remember the last flu shot I got. I believe that our immune systems work better when exposed to things. It's how it learns. The occasional vaccine is good, so our bodies know how to deal with it. But every year time after time, all the 'purell' and other stuff to me is just idiotic. Turning us slowly into boy-in-a-bubble types. Yes, the key thing to depression is finding out the root, or at least the general area, and improving that side of things somehow. Not having your daughter around can of course be a big thing. One thing I can talk to about the 'system' is the whole thing of 'they want you coming back'. So they won't 'cure' you, but make it better slowly. I am (or was at least) a Certified Hypnotherapist. I got into hypnosis on my own ages ago for fun. But even when doing it for fun with partners, I often helped with things. Pain management, sleeping better, stop smoking, etc, etc, etc. I did enough of it that when I had an opportunity to get certified, I figured 'hey why not'. Here's what I learned: How to draw it out and make the most money possible. I didn't learn anything I didn't already know of how to help with 'clinical' hypnosis. I learned some things that I thought would be detrimental to a 'speedier' help/cure/fix. I've been able to cure strong phobias some people have with just 1 or 2 sessions. One of those was 2 sessions ONLINE. Yahoo messenger. Not even voice or face to face. Yet the 'certification' was a matter of 'tell them it will be at least 4 sessions, can go up to 6 or 8, with $XXX per session.. .blah blah blah'. Giving them 'homework' and slow desensitizing stuff. That's basic 'shrink' based stuff, but at least with theoretical end result of getting them over the fear/phobia. It's a way to draw things out and make sure you get paid as much as you can.
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Jamozk Ekhiss
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Post by Jamozk Ekhiss on Oct 24, 2013 12:36:16 GMT -5
That's something that annoys me about modern society in general - countries as a whole are run as businesses, with little care for the people in them besides how much they pay.
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Post by johndramey on Oct 24, 2013 19:38:33 GMT -5
HateSolstice - First off, brother, sorry to hear about all your problems. I am lucky to be a relatively healthy, happy guy but I think we can all understand you on some level. Everyone has had some situation where they feel a kind of... funk. I went through such a time about 5 years ago, and it lasted me just about 1 year. Nothing so serious that I would say I was clinically depressed, but it definitely effected my life and made me a rather miserable person to be around. How did I fix it? Well, I changed my job which went a long, long way to curing most of the ills that beset me. However, like dayan said, I found a "calling" of a sort. Something I could lose myself in regularly and just focus on the task. For me, that thing is running marathons. Hear me out! I know most people think "I can't do that, that's for crazy people and health freaks," but that's just not true. Anyone can do a marathon with just a little preparation and dedication. The best thing about marathoning? You don't need to spend a lot of money and you have a lot of time to just... clear your head. Seriously, I've gotten much more serious about my marathoning these days so I have 2 to 3 pairs of shoes in rotation, but even that just cost me a little over $150. You don't need expensive running shoes, you don't need fancy clothes, and you don't need any special gadgets. All that goes double if you are just doing it for fun. I seriously recommend doing something like marathoning. You can spend some set amount of time (I run about an hour a day, but you can do much less or more depending) every day just... living. You don't really have the opportunity to worry while running, you focus on your breathing and your stride. You can enjoy the fresh air, feel healthy and, really honestly, you just don't care about your stress. Try feeling bummed out after you pounded out a 10k in 45 minutes after 6 months of training, you can't! Nothing matches the high of looking at your running diary and saying "I did that." It's simple, it's brainless, and that's the beauty of it. I just passed the 1,000 kilometer mark a couple days ago and it feels great, but you get the same rush after your first 5k, 10k, 50k, 100k, and so on. It's really just a simple activity that sets a simple goal in front of you. Seriously, try it out. Go out for a 1k run some day. If you like it, try 2k! Soon enough you'll be like me, running 11-15k every day.
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Post by HateSolstice on Oct 24, 2013 23:41:19 GMT -5
Alex Fury - Yeah, I assumed it was mostly frustration with the system. The part of the system I hate is the insurance side of things. Kind of like car insurance: you're forced into paying for something you hope you never need. Unlike car insurance, it's not illegal to not have health insurance. Luckily, I have a really good union job that pays pretty damn well. I work for Boeing, so working on the airplanes is a really.....interesting experience and process. It's one of those jobs that no amount of job history and experience will ever prepare you for it. johndramey - I've heard of people, lots of people, doing that sort of thing as a personal rehabilitation. Unfortunately, it's not for me. I've never really enjoyed that sort of activity, even when I was younger. I have tried a few things to try and help myself - I tried volunteering at the local Humane Society where my wife works(started about 3 months ago now I think); tried going for walks around the neighborhood, just to be outdoors and not lock myself up, etc. - but nothing seems to have worked. Nothing has been able to really help, but I'm going to keep at it until I find something. I just hope it's in time. Anyway, I can't find it, but I could have sworn I mentioned my attempt at suicide a few years ago. It was at the end of 2010, September I think, and I was in a really bad place at the time. My wife and I were having serious issues, especially due to her ex-boyfriend(the one I mentioned in my first couple posts; not the ex-husband) having absolutely no respect for our relationship. He knows/knew that he can manipulate her feelings to get what he wants, and every time she falls for it, he destroys her after. So, between him trying to manipulate her like always, being harassed by a group of managers at work that were colluding to get me fired- one of them physically shoved me because I demanded my union rep to be present while he was trying to take me to HR for receiving an emergency call from my wife.....yes, it really was that fucking stupid, pardon my language - plus having to work mandatory 10 hour days 5 days a week plus mandatory Saturdays and Sundays, AND commuting over 60 miles each way for work(with how terrible our highway system is here, that's roughly an additional 4 hours to my work day; I live near Seattle, FYI), my sanity was slipping terribly. *Quick Note: Before I forget to include this bit of info, because I feel that it actually helps explain my dilemma a bit more, I am a mechanic on the 787 program here in Everett. In the very beginning of the program's existence, the company did as much as it could to keep the union's presence from spreading into the employee's numbers. They did this by hiring completely new people off the streets - the company even went to Vietnam and hired a TON of people from there, knowing they would work without knowing their rights or ever making use of their union representatives - and thus most people there have been trained to distrust the union altogether. I mention all of this simply to tell you that, during this incident with the "gang" of managers, my union rep essentially did nothing. Or, at the very least, didn't seem to visibly do anything for me. The problems did eventually dissipate, but I'll tell that story some other time.* Anyway, all this stuff compounded into an evening where my wife had decided she was going to move out and leave me for her manipulative ass ex-boyfriend. While she was in the middle of moving things into her car, I apparently snapped inside and tried to hang myself from a closet door using my belt. I say apparently because I have no recollection of what happened after she started walking out to her car from our apartment. I guess it might have been a couple minutes, but she tells me that she struggled for several minutes to keep me from slouching further AND open the door at the same time. Thankfully, she managed to get me down, call an ambulance, and save my life. It should also be mentioned that none of our kids were home when this happened, and weren't aware of it. As far as I am aware, the kids still don't know. Ultimately, I self-admitted myself to a mental health facility(at the extreme request of my wife) to get help. It was a very, very good experience and they did a lot for me there. Sadly, from I have heard recently, that facility is no longer there. I think that should be it for tonight. I hadn't originally planned on typing up this much today, especially this particular event, but somehow it feels like this is helping. Though it is not my place to intrude on anyone, I would like to encourage anyone that feels the need to talk to go ahead and use this thread for their own help. I don't want anyone thinking or feeling that this is all about me, and I am pretty sure you guys are both observant and astute enough to know that.
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Post by HateSolstice on Oct 24, 2013 23:43:29 GMT -5
Oh, I almost forgot! At the same time all that other craziness was going on, my mother had been diagnosed and in the hospital for a large brain tumor.
So yeah, lots of great stuff all at once.
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