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Post by Jacob on Jan 22, 2014 18:44:24 GMT -5
The tin man went Mohammed Ali on one of the right drones... ''What's my Name, *Hit*, what's my name, *Hit*, what's my name??!'' Or something like that?  Sent from my broken HTC Desire C using proboards. Anyone's got a fan? |
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Post by rabidbite on Jan 22, 2014 19:07:59 GMT -5
Heck, I wish my brain would stop putting 'Victoria' where 'Veronica' should go.
rabid
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Post by rabidbite on Jan 22, 2014 22:07:28 GMT -5
Awesome. I just finished writing the main plot point outlines of Cerberus' end. I can finally say I have a reasonable window of how it all fits together. rabid |
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Post by Jacob on Jan 23, 2014 5:21:33 GMT -5
I can finally say I have a reasonable window of how it all fits together. So you say that, when you started to write this piece of epicness, you had no idea of how it would end? LOL! Would have preferred it that way, so you'd be forced to keep writing! Sent from my broken HTC Desire C using proboards. Anyone's got a fan? |
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Post by rabidbite on Jan 23, 2014 13:42:01 GMT -5
Hah, I knew how the MAIN plot line ended. I didn't know the PATH I would take to that particular ending. Plus, once you write, you learn that an END has many other plot lines attached to it, not simply the main one. Those I wasn't so sure about. rabid |
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Post by Jacob on Jan 24, 2014 2:53:05 GMT -5
Mind if I fill in a few writing errors?
actS.
More to come
Sent from my broken HTC Desire C using proboards. Anyone's got a fan?
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Post by rabidbite on Jan 24, 2014 5:23:00 GMT -5
Not only that, there are 6 punctuation mistakes that I can see right off the bat, another Veronica vs Victoria mixup, wrong sentence structures, I even did a where vs were mistake.
I'm not proofing a lot (notice I've posted 1 per day and the posts have been rather large?) kind of want to get to the end. Want to spend some time reading other people's work too ('In the Net' for one). Nevertheless, no excuse to get too sloppy. Thx for the help.
rabid
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Post by rabidbite on Jan 25, 2014 7:56:38 GMT -5
So, I've been going over the last few posts and had to shake my head. They are lacking a hell of a lot of flavor text. As they read now its more like car stereo instructions. 1. They arrived. 2. They fought. 3. They moved X place. 4. blah blah.
The scenes are lacking a lot of undercurrents, so going to devote a little time to a few of them.
I'm probably rushing too much.
rabid
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Post by rabidbite on Jan 25, 2014 12:01:36 GMT -5
I modified the last 3 posts. I think they flow a lot better. Working on future installments next.
rabid
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Jamozk Ekhiss
Star Hero
This is not the Personal Text you are looking for.
Posts: 599
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Post by Jamozk Ekhiss on Jan 25, 2014 15:22:42 GMT -5
I knew Cerberus was screwing Stryker over somehow. I thought he had to be, but I couldn't work it out at the time. Cerberus, you mad genius...
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Post by rabidbite on Jan 26, 2014 16:26:02 GMT -5
You know, I read a little of Cerberus part II, fixed a lot of errors and one glaring inconsistency.
I'm also kind of amazed.
Mistakes aside, I can't believe all that came out of my head.
We're getting close to the end my friends. A few more secrets to go. A few more revelations.
rabid
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Post by Jacob on Jan 26, 2014 21:01:18 GMT -5
The End?!
No, please not! That mustn't be!!
Damn it...
Sent from my broken HTC Desire C using proboards. Anyone's got a fan?
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Post by Jacob on Jan 28, 2014 1:12:34 GMT -5
Hmm.. now I'm halfway into thinking that, as soon as they land, they'll be incinerated...
I hope I am wrong.
Sent from my broken HTC Desire C using proboards. Anyone's got a fan?
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Post by Jacob on Jan 28, 2014 1:23:20 GMT -5
BTW, why are you doing that vic/ver-mixup?
Sent from my broken HTC Desire C using proboards. Anyone's got a fan?
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Post by rabidbite on Jan 28, 2014 7:09:55 GMT -5
BTW, why are you doing that vic/ver-mixup? Sent from my broken HTC Desire C using proboards. Anyone's got a fan? A couple of reasons. I like the name Victoria. It directly means "Victory". It is strong, flows easier on the mind than Ve-ro-ni-ca, etc. Why not use it? I think it is too good a name for the character Veronica! Hahahaha! I want to save Victoria for a main protagonist. rabid |
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